Gotcha' Day...April 4, 2011

It is really true...we have our official travel dates! We leave April 2nd and return April 9th! It feels almost surreal. I'm almost scared to fully feel the joy...the guards around my heart are not wanting to let go! But, let go they must...because Selah is comin' home!

Last week had some bleak moments when we learned that there had been an error on our court decree and that it would cause another delay. Delay was not a word my heart could handle very well. There were more tears and then plain ol' anger...but in the end, the delay was only two extra weeks from our initial tentative dates. As it turns out, "Gotcha Day" will be exactly seven months from the time we left our sweet girl.

Seven months is a long time. It is forever in the life of a 4-year-old. My brain and heart has run wild lately. I started letting my mind think things that are absolutely contrary to the Word of God. I worried about the loss of developmental time, the loss of bonding time, the loss of intervention time, the loss, the loss, the loss. (I think you get my point!)  But God ever so gently filled my heart with the reminder that He is God, the very same One Who created the universe. Time is not of concern to Him. He is bigger than time. He is bigger than any loss I can ever come up with. He has a plan for Selah and there is nothing in this world that can stop that plan....not 4 1/2 years...and definitely not 7 months!

A few months before we began our adoption process Salvador had released a song called "Aware". I know I am always posting song lyrics and Youtube videos, but it is because music is just a part of my wiring! Every big moment in life I can recall through music. So, I fell in love with the song "Aware" because it is a calling out to God to "make me aware" of how He is in every detail of our lives from the small to the big, from the insignificant to the life-changing. One line in the song says:

"Take my world, turn it around, so that the obvious can finally be found."

I prayed those words because I felt such an intense stirring in my soul that said there was something I was supposed to be doing. So I prayed that God would break my heart for what breaks His, and that He would make me so aware of His presence in my life that I would never forget that it is Him in me that makes all things possible.

That prayer was answered tenfold. I have been taught over and over again that He is in every detail. He has been there in times of joy and in times of sadness. He has loved me when I was angry at others and even angry at Him. He has forgiven me for each sinful thought, word, and deed throughout the last two years and especially throughout the last few months! And now, as we prepare for the last leg of this portion of our journey with Selah, I know that the obvious has finally been found. He did turn my world upside down...and I am so incredibly thankful.

Here's the song with lyrics:

P.S. God's designing of the number 7 to represent perfection...pretty cool, huh?! I think I will receive that as a Word from Him that reminds me of His perfect timing and that everything is going to be just fine:-)



I Can't Wait!

Today is my sweet Zachary's 9th birthday! He is growing up so fast and I am so proud of who he is becoming! I'll have to post some pictures later, 'cuz I want to list the first four folks who posted so I can get addresses and send off these books tomorrow! Zach's birthday party starts in about a half hour...nothing like crunching as much into the day as possible! :-)

Okay...Shelley, Maire, Viviane, and Debby! If you send me an email with your addresses I would LOVE to send Reckless Faith out to you!!!

Have a wonderful and blessed remainder of your Sunday!

Smiles and blessings,

A Huge Thank You!

I wanted to send out a great big "Thank You" to everyone who has so lovingly supported us in thoughts and prayers throughout this journey. We have learned soooooooo many things along the way and God has used the last couple of years to teach us so many very important things about Him...about life on this side of the cross...and about who He wants us to become. One of those "things" He has taught us, is a whole new appreciation for the kindness of others. So, thank you...thank you...thank you for sharing your hearts with us, for encouraging us when the disappointments were huge, and for celebrating with us when the news was great!

In light of wanting to show my gratitude, I had a little idea. I recently read a book that I absolutely loved. I loved it simply for the love. The book is titled Reckless Faith by Beth Guckenberger. The love and passion that fuels Beth's heart moved me deeply. The story is about the call on her life to care for orphans...to care for the least of these. Her obedience to God is amazing and the love she has for the children is clearly just as amazing.(Check out Back2Back Ministries) So, since the book is so filled with love and kindness...it's kind of my way to share a little bit of love and kindness with you! I wish I could get one for everyone, but since I can't, I bought four of them and would love to give them away! I will send a copy to the first four people that post a comment. After you post, I will list the first four names in my next post, and those people can then email me with their address. You can email me directly from my blog profile!

There is no new news regarding Selah or our travel dates. I am just busy nesting and getting as much ready as I can while praying it will be super soon!!!

Thanks again to everyone and all your love, support, and prayers! God has used y'all to help to move some big 'ol mountains for us!!!!

My favorite photo...when she took her daddy's hand, she took his heart right with it.

Blessings and smiles,

It's Really True...Selah is Coming Home!

Okay....I'm having to stop the tears of joy to write this right now!!!! We just received the most wonderful news that we are officially the parents of a beautiful little Bulgarian princess! I introduce you to Selah!

I cannot believe how absolutely blessed we are to be given this precious daughter. I know there have been moments where my faith was shaken, my patience unwound, and my heart broken...but God (aren't those two awesome words?...But God...) moved the mountains. He has parted our Red Sea and we will be rushing across that open road He carved for us just as soon as we can!!! 

Our next step is to await the completion of Selah's certificate of Adoption and then travel! I pray the wait is not long, but now I truly can see the moment coming when I can wrap her in my arms and never have to walk away again! The moment we can truly be a family...

Trying to Believe....

Our judge did not follow through with her commitment on Monday. We found out late Monday that she didn't come into work that day so we needed to wait for today to see what she would do. The call came today saying that she changed her mind again and is requesting an official letter from the US Embassy verifying that the FBI clearance is the highest level of security in the United States. Her meeting with the representative from the Embassy was not sufficient.

We are crushed, stunned, disappointed, frustrated....completely broken hearted. I wrote a letter today imploring the Embassy for help in this matter. Our hands feel so tied...

I have sat and tried to find insight into her perspective...does she know that this little girl has spent way too many days, weeks, months, years in an orphanage without a family? Does she have any idea of how great our love is for this little girl? Does she have any idea that we would do anything within our own physical power to bring her home? Does she realize our hearts have a huge hole in them filled with the grief of not having her home yet? If only I could get her to understand this...then maybe she would not do this to us or to any other family ever again.

I know I have to believe that the time will come. She will be ours. I need to stay strong and keep my faith. I know my faith is there, but it feels like it is in a million pieces around me. I keep getting back up and putting it back together, but then the next wave of emotion comes and knocks it all down again. But, I'm going to keep picking up the pieces and I am going to keep trusting the Lord and believing He will bring Selah home. I am going to praise Him for all the blessings in my life and praise Him for showing me the true heart of adoption...showing me a love that I never understood before...giving me a glimpse of the love He has when He adopts us into His family. It is a powerful love. It is a love that can move mountains and that is the promise I am going to hold onto...and never let go.

Lori

One More Week of Believing in Faith…

My dear friend, Col, was here with me today when we received the telephone call. She has shared in this journey even before ours began. The adoption of her little girl moved not only mine, but my husbands heart to a place of hearing God's call on our lives to adopt. She is guest blogging for me today because she knows my brain is too scattered to pull things together for a while yet and I just knew she would be able to convey our hearts without skipping a beat!

Today’s call was not exactly the call Lori and Bryan were hoping for… but they are fixing their eyes of faith on the light at the end of this tunnel. The judge in Bulgaria committed to approve Selah’s adoption on Monday. Yes, six more days of waiting in hope and trusting in God’s faithfulness until she is officially Selah Schumaker.


One highlight of the call is that the Monday after that (2/28), her birth certificate will be issued, which is an exciting change from what they had been told before. Birth certificate wait time used to be two to three weeks. Travel should be scheduled one to two weeks from February 28th.

As a friend who has traveled the adoption journey, I simply cannot imagine the ache that Lori and Bryan and their boys have walked… wanting their little girl home so desperately and yet living the challenge of a system that at times seems set against this princess’s new life in her forever family. Surely, many of you have struggled like the Schumakers when God’s timing just does not seem to make sense at all. We believe with all that we are the Truth found in His Word that says His ways are higher, yet everything inside us sometimes cries out for things to move along!

I think about a verse in Job. It’s 23:10. Check it out. After countless struggles and so much frustration, Job says, “But, He knows the way I take; and when He has tested me, I will come forth as gold.” Bryan and Lori have had an adoption journey like no other. They have been tested and tried, and tested again. And each of us who loves them has been challenged by their unyielding faith and humbled by their relentless pursuit of a little girl who sits today in an orphanage in Bulgaria. I look at them, and I see gold. Pure gold. They are a living testimony of God’s love… it never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.

So, today we stand again with the Schumakers. We pray and cry out for the next six days. We believe with them that in six days a little girl’s name will be changed. And not just her name, but her destiny. We long for the moment when we can rejoice together that our girl is coming home to be loved and treasured by so many of us.

And we will give our God, who makes all things right, and who’s timing is perfect, all the glory.

Coleen

Patience

Today was the day I thought I would post Selah's picture and introduce her to the world. But, not yet. Our judge did not approve our case today. She did reschedule it for Tuesday, though. She has requested some things that are quite out of the ordinary. But, after a huge cry, I got back up and started working on what we could provide. It meant running around a lot and in a hurry to print, notarize, travel downtown to the Secretary of State Office in Phoenix for an apostille, and then to our friendly UPS to overnight the forms. The US Embassy is also writing a letter on our behalf to verify that the FBI clearance is the highest level of security clearance available in the United States and if we do not have an arrest record on either the local, state, or Federal level, we have not been convicted of any crimes. If only the judge could know that I haven't even had a speeding ticket in longer than I can remember!

So.....now we wait patiently and in prayer for Tuesday. I'm praying it is God's will that our case be approved then. I'm feeling really weary right now... It has been one year and one month since the first time I saw Selah's face and my heart exploded for her. Now it has been five months and one week since I last held her in my arms. So many ups and downs...but a new day has got to come...and I know we just need to hold on just a little bit longer.

I am so thankful for all the love, support, and prayers from so many of you...friends and family. It helps these tough days be much more bearable. We are blessed with wonderful people in our lives and God has revealed that to us a million times over! Thank you!