Christmas Once Again

We have not yet heard anything...but I am not giving up hope yet!  I'm really taking either what you could call the "stubborn" route, or the "living safely in my bubble" route! I think I'll stick with calling it anticipating with faith from every corner of my heart.

We have really tried to focus on the fun....buying presents for Selah that she can open whenever she comes home and is ready, decorating her room, and even a beautiful little gathering hosted by some just as beautiful friends in honor of Selah!

Oooooo, the presents! I know that our two boys have had just as much fun as us shopping for our little sweet pea! They are adorable in the way they ALWAYS have her on their minds and in their hearts. AND, did I mention we have the CUTEST princess Christmas wrapping paper EVER? It was donated by a sweet friend who just knew it would make me smile :-)

Decorating her room is coming along bit by bit. I have found the neatest things on Etsy! I love that website and all the folks who have such an incredible God-given gift to create such beautiful things!

And our Selah Celebration! I usually host a pretty big cookie exchange party in December and somehow get amazing women to bake somewhere around 7 dozen cookies! It is usually a wonderful time because it is a chance to get to see so many of my dear friends that I don't always get to connect with. This year, however, my friends knew my spirits were a little low and knew that hosting the party would be rough. So, because they are just so stinkin' good to me, they confiscated the party and turned it into a shower of sorts! It was so good for my heart. I was able to share all the pictures I have of our sweet little girl, be blessed with some of the most adorable little outfits, bracelets, and hair pretties,  AND the gals even made a collection for the orphanage. When we were last there, the director had told us that what they really dreamed of being able to do was to take a group of children to the Black Sea for a week of fun and therapy. Of course, they would not be able to do it on their regular funds (which are minimal) and it would only happen through donation. So, I am so very very happy to say that we are going to be able to get this donation to them and give those precious little treasures the opportunity to explore beyond the walls of their orphanage and to simply have fun like they have never before experienced! I am just so thankful for all the loving people God has surrounded us with in our life. I cannot imagine this journey without the support of so many! Again, He is just so good!

In closing I am going to post the video I posted last year at this time. It is the song called "Merry Christmas" by Third Day. It is a song written about a little girl in an orphanage waiting for her mommy. Get out the kleenex if you are even the least bit of an emotional sort of person! Last year I had hoped would be the last Christmas without Selah home, but we have this one more and I am so very thankful that it is just this one more. I know as we go through and meet other families and watch as they bring their babies home, it is often bittersweet. Please know, that I am with all of you in prayer as you have either brought your child home already, or are in Bulgaria right now (as one friend is!) picking up your child, making travel plans to get them, or are still in the ever challenging stage of waiting. My heart and my prayers are with each and every one of you this Christmas.

He has caused his wonders to be remembered; the LORD is gracious and compassionate.Psalm
111:14

“Look! The virgin will conceive a child! She will give birth to a son, and they will call him Immanuel, which means ‘God is with us.’” Matthew 1:23

His Way of Molding a Heart

We don't really have much news. Our agency called and told us that the MOJ needed an extra copy of that 1-800A form that gave us such headaches....Not really good news, but at least we know that someone is working on our file rather than it being in the pile of files on the desk of someone who has left for the month! So, I am still praying boldly that a court hearing will be scheduled before Christmas! I know that I may sound a bit wacky...but praying with anticipation and a faith that is simply expecting God to come through right now is getting me by each day. I may be a mess come Christmas, but I KNOW God will get me through that, too, if it does happen to happen (but it won't!)!

But, in the meantime, I wanted to share something so adorable that my son, Zachary, wrote. Last weekend I had him and his brother each take a "quiet time" in their separate rooms. They didn't want to nap, but we all needed a wee little break from each other! So, after about an hour, Zach comes downstairs and asks me if he can share a story he had been writing while in his room. He started reading it and I, of course, started crying (doesn't take much these days). I won't tell you what it was all about, rather, I will just post it here below. But, as you read, just think of the way God has molded his sweet little heart through our adoption process. We started the process almost 2 years ago, so at 8 years old now, that is 25% of his life waiting for his sister and learning about orphans and adoption. I am so thankful to God for the way He has filled the hearts of both of our boys with so much love and compassion for the things that break God's heart most. How amazing that at 8 years old, he really gets it...he gets what the heart of adoption is all about.

The Christmas Wish

By

Zachary Schumaker

Once upon a time there lived a six-year-old boy named Jonathan. He was an orphan little boy. He was very lonely. In the orphanage, he had no friends at all. That made him even more sad. But, the thing that made him the saddest of all was that he had no Mother, no Father, no brother, no sister, and no pets at all. He had never even known his parents. He only knew that when his birth mother had given him away, she had said that God and Jesus would always be shining with him.

He sat in the orphanage year after year. As he got older he got lonelier and lonelier. He sat by the telephone waiting and waiting for it to ring. He sat there for six years. One day, finally the telephone rang. Mary, one of the helpers, answered the telephone. When she got off the telephone, she had a big smile. Jonathan asked, “Why are you smiling so big?’ Mary said, “A family named the Fanners want to adopt you.”


The Fanners had a boy named Angelo and a girl named Kailyn, a dog named Rover and a Mom named Susie and a Dad named Michael. Jonathan was so happy that he ran all over the orphanage screaming and yelling with joy!


On November 26, 2009 the Fanners flew to North Africa to see their six-year-old son, Jonathan. Right as they saw Jonathan, they knew that he was the one that Jesus planned for their new family.


When Jonathan saw his parents for the first time, he jumped up and ran to hug them and his brother and sister. The new brothers and sister played and laughed so much. Jonathan smiled for the first time in his life.


Angelo and Kailyn taught Jonnathan English, too. They stayed in Africa for two whole weeks. On December 4, 2009, they brought Jonathan home. The family got Jonathan for Christmas and Jonathan got his family. Little Jonathan got a tricycle, a DS, and a new puppy for the beginning of his new life for Christmas. Little Jonathan said he had his number one Christmas ever. But, the best present of all was his family.

“God places the lonely in families.” Psalm 68:6

Decorating with Love

I know that I have referred to my excitement at the prospect of shopping "pink" AND of how I have had some very fun days doing just that, so I thought it would be kinda fun to share some of the neat things I've found while we have been waiting to bring Selah home! The room is getting close to being ready...I've been taking my time trying to throw all my love into getting just the right stuff. It's sort of like my way of loving on her when I can't yet have her in my arms. WHICH, with each day comes one day closer to a reality. We still don't know very much. We are waiting for a court date. Please pray with us that the court date happens prior to Christmas! If it doesn't, because of the December holidays, it will mean a January court date and then another 5-6 weeks until we can pick her up after that (if it is approved at the hearing). I think I may have mentioned it, but my prayers are getting BOLD! Join me? Please?



I sang this song in Selah's little ears over and over while we visited her. I pray everyday that she comes to know and understand the meaning of this message in her heart, her soul, and her mind...and that she already feels His love each and every day.

This little girl is not only chosen, cherished, and beloved by us, but first and foremost by our Heavenly Father!

One of the hutches of the bedroom set we purchased for her decorated with a few things chosen with the utmost love! The Disney Princesses were actually dolls I had purchased several years ago for my someday daughter! It's a miracle in itself that I now know that I will have a daughter...that I DO have a daughter!

Books...at the heart of every teacher (or former teacher in my case!). Also, this prayer book by Stormie Omartian is absolutely beautiful!

Could this outfit get any cuter?

A close-up of the SHOES!!! I can just envision her cute little feet in these!

A true statement. She already has him wrapped around her liitle finger!

I pray that someday our little Selah will come to understand the depths of our love. I pray that she will know how every step of this journey was taken with hearts absolutely full of love...from her mommy, daddy, and brothers Zachary and Landon.

May you experience the love of Christ, though it is too great to understand fully. Then you will be made complete with all the fullness of life and power that comes from God.

Ephesians 3:19

Thank You

Happy Thanksgiving! As this day of Thanksgiving has come and almost gone once again, I am reminded of all the blessings for which we have to give thanks. I want to be sure, though, that being thankful isn't saved for this one special day.

I feel that our family does a pretty good job of being thankful all the time and that we really work at instilling that sense of thankfullness in our children... but there is ALWAYS room for improvement! This year has been a test of that! There have been times I have been so thankful to our awesome God for something that has happened correctly or beautifully in the course of adopting Selah. BUT there have been the days I want to curl up under my covers- actually pull them right over my head- and cry my eyes out, or simply eat every piece of chocolate or ice cream followed by some kind of crunchy salty sort of thing that can be found in this house. SOMETIMES it HAS to be the Italian Nachos from Old Chicago! They have more calories and fat than I need for an entire month, but they sure do seem to ease the pain of self-pity. So, I think the picture is pretty clear....instead of looking to the One Who has it all under control, Who made it all possible in the first place and thanking Him for all the good in our lives, I often find myself under those covers, eating the chocolate, or having Italian Nachos at Old Chicago! Definitely something I need to work on!
This song by one of my favorite Christian artists, 33 Miles, kinda says it all! Enjoy! May we all find the way to our Savior when things are not going so well...instead of the way to the chocolate!

 

 
Lord, I thank You for loving me even when I am so unthankful. I thank You for being so patient with me when I drown my sorrows in tears and/or food! Lord , I thank You for all Your beautiful blessings and I know that You alone have made all of it possible! Thank You for holding our Selah tight while we wait to be together. Thank You for planning this all in Your perfect timing and for having a plan for us and a journey and a path set before us.

It's a New Day!

Light is sweet; how pleasant to see a new day dawning.

Ecclesiastes 11:7

Last week was the pits...nothing seemed to go right. Our NBC paperwork STILL had not approved, I woke up (on my birthday of all days) with a double ear infection, my son decided that on the day of my birthday and double ear infection he would have one of the WORST behavior days EVER, and then he ended up home sick the day after that!!! By now I should know that whenever my boys act particularly naughty, they are usually coming down with something!!! The week ended on Friday with one more request from our NBC officer for just one more document. Really? All I could do was cry.

This week, however, began "a new day dawning"! Bryan started our Monday morning with an attempt at 6:00 a.m. (4:00 p.m. in Bulgaria) to call Selah. We had been consistently trying to Skype, but we could never make a connection with the orphanage, so now we just try to call using Skype Calling (which is waaaaaay cheaper than regular phone) to their land line. My sweet husband now makes these call attempts on his own in order to protect my heart. After a few attempts that ended either with no answer, or a disconnected line, or being told in Bulgarian "Ne, Selah" (no Selah was all I could understand since my Bulgarian is almost non-existent), my heart would become so fragile and what felt like one more rejection. Now chooses to protect my heart (he handles the let-downs soooooo much better than I do) and makes the communication attempts. If he is successful, he then yells frantically for me to wake up and come downstairs to the computer!!! (I know...I am extremely blessed to have him)

So, Monday morning the call went through and then to Bryan's surprise, the director video called us back! Bryan was so excited he just started yelling for me in a crazy sort of frantic way that made me think something horrible had happened! I run downstairs in my pj's with my hair crazy wild and there on the screen is our sweet little girl! She was smiling and beautiful! I'm sure she would agree with the smiling part on her assessment of me, but the beautiful part surely she would not! She probably thought, "Wow, Mommy looks a little crazy!".

We still had one little glitch, though. We could not hear her nor the director, we instead heard a Bulgarian radio station of some sort! We still can't figure that out! Anyone have any ideas? But, she could hear us and that, to me, is so much more important. I want her to remember our voices and see our faces and recall the memories we made together so that she knows in her heart that we truly will come back and that we have not forgotten her. And let me tell you...memory? Hers was uncanny! I started singing "Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star" and she immediately started doing the actions with me and I could see her mouth moving to sing with me! Then Bryan made his funny fish face at her that she had loved so much, and without missing even a single beat, she made the face right back at him and started giggling! I cannot even tell you how much that brought peace to my heart. It was as if God made this happen just when He knew my heart was at a breaking point....God is so good!

You would think that was enough good news...but, yes, I have MORE!!! Later that afternoon, we finally got our NBC approval! Thank You, Lord!!! It was such a weight off our shoulders to know that after so many delays, we had finally made it past that phase. Sadly, it didn't happen quick enough to get us back to Selah before Christmas (short of a miracle from God - which I do believe He is still in the business of doing!), but it still means that we are one step closer to bringing our baby home!

So, all in all? THAT is what I call "a new day" and I am so very thankful for that very needed gift from Above! Can I get an "Amen"?!! :-)

Thoughts While We Wait

We still do not  have an approval from the NBC...please pray with us that it will be this week. It feels that as each day passes right now, it means a month in trip time because of the Holiday time in Bulgaria in December. I am still believing in God's miracles...and if a miracle is not His choice, I can find peace in His will. He makes all things good.

But, in the meantime, there were a couple of little tidbits of helpful and fun info I wanted to share. One was about a neat little company called Hullabaloo Stories. This gal creates photo books, BUT they are WAY BETTER than your typical photo books because this gal creates photo BOARD BOOKS! We made a book for Selah and brought it to her. Christine at Hullabaloo was so fun to work with! She wanted to make sure the book was exactly what we wanted with both pictures, wording, and color. She is absolutely wonderful! The neat part about the board book is that you can leave it at the orphanage so your child can have it all the time and not worry that it will get destroyed by the loving hands of many little ones! We kept it simple with pictures of her that we received with our referral, pictures of us, our dog, the house, the backyard, etc. The wording just said things like "my family", "my mommy", "my daddy", "my brother", etc.  You can find her website at www.hullabaloostories.com.

The other tidbit was the trick my girlfriend passed along to me after her experience with adoption and mission work. She made sure I traced Selah's foot on a piece of paper while I was with her. That way, when I got back home, I could put it on one of those shoe chart thingies and find out a pretty accurate shoe size. I thought it was genius and on some of my bluest days, I have purchased the cutest shoes EVER! Just wait for my next post....I'll make sure to take some photos of those cute shoes!

So, that's all, but please don't forget to pray! :-) Thanks y'all!

For you have need of steadfast patience and endurance, so that you may perform and fully accomplish the will of God, and thus receive and carry away [and enjoy to the full] what is promised.

Hebrews 10:36

Keeping My Eyes on the Lord

Emotions. Emotions. And MORE emotions.

This wait is so stinkin' hard. There are days I want to curl up under the covers and cry...and days I want to therapeutically shop until I drop. There are also the days when I want to scream at someone...anyone will do. The other night I was driving up north in a mountainous region and had one bad mishap that involved a flat tire and then not 10 miles after finally getting back on the road, a police officer pulled me over! I guess I had been going a little too fast, but he never even got the opportunity to tell me how fast I was going! That was because I burst into voracious tears immediately and could say nothing more than to squeak out that it had been a horrible week. It was seriously ALL I COULD DO to not tell this poor man about our little girl waiting for us halfway around the world and our paperwork being majorly delayed! Can you just imagine him thinking "oh, boy, what have I just gotten myself into?'. Can you believe that in the midst of this chaos, God sent me this kind and compassionate officer who only looked at me for a second and then felt compelled to spend the rest of his time trying to calm me down and reassure me that he wouldn't be giving me a ticket?!!! Soooooo,  in the midst of each of my chaotic emotions, I keep reminding myself to keep my eyes on the Lord and claim His promises for our family.

Over the last few days, I have been reading Isaiah and God has spoken to me so clearly from there and has gently reminded me where to keep my focus. You see, we have not yet received our NBC approval. The short story is that it began with our original home study parameters saying we wanted to adopt a child between the ages of 0 and 3. Well, our Selah is 4. So, the officer handling our paperwork said we had to submit an addendum from our social worker stating that we are approved for a 4-year-old child. We took care of that and I fed-exed everything there only to have it sit in the Texas office for 2 1/2 weeks before it was sent to our officer in Missouri. THEN, our officer decided that the addendum was not sufficient, but that we needed to have a home visit AND our state CPS checks redone. We are hoping for this to all be in the hands of the officer next week and then I pray approved immediately.

I just couldn't believe that we would have all these issues on this side of the paperwork. I expected glitches...but later, once the paperwork was in Bulgaria. Maybe now that we have already provided brand new copies of practically everything, all the other various offices, people, and judges that will be looking at our paperwork will not find anything to question or request. Maybe? Hopefully?

So, back to Isaiah. In Isaiah 54, God tells me that "No weapon that is formed against me shall prosper". Satan loves to mess with all things that are good. I recently read that marriage and adoption are the two most powerful covenants we make to honor God. Because these two covenants are so powerful, Satan works overtime to try to destroy them. As we travel along this journey of adoption, we all know how gut-wrenchingly painful things can be. I wonder how many people have either not taken the journey or have walked away from it because of the attacks of our enemy. 

But God. Our amazing, powerful, loving, and ever faithful God! He tells us that

• He will not allow any weapons from the enemy to prosper against us.
• He will open doors before us, so that gates will not be shut.
• He will go before us and level the mountains
• He will contend with them who contend  with us, and He will give safety to our children and ease them.
• He will go before us and also be our rear guard.
• His word never returns void, it always accomplishes its purpose.
• He has set watchmen around us to guard us day and night.
• He loves justice.

And all of that is JUST IN ISAIAH! Imagine what the rest of His word promises us!

I have been witness to and lived out the power of God, and the power of His word. So, I'm not going to get stuck crying under my covers or caught frightening police officers with my tears. Rather, I am going to be claiming the word of the Lord over our adoption journey and over each and every one of your adoption journeys as well. There is not a weapon the enemy can try against any of us that will prevail. He can just give up now, 'cuz all of us are bringin' our babies home!